Personal effects memorandum

Estate Planning and Personal Effects

Who gets mom's wedding ring?! When clients hire me to create their estate planning documents, we have a thorough conversation about their assets, how they are held, and to whom they want them to go to. This conversation is focused primarily on the large assets, such as the family home, retirement accounts, insurance policies, other properties and investment accounts. Part of the initial estate planning process is to really look at these and then clearly designate beneficiaries.


Inevitably during this discussion, the client’s personal effects come up. In Colorado, personal effects, such as grandmother’s antique ring, grandfather’s favorite chair, mom’s jewelry, dad’s watch, etc., can be designated in a separate Memorandum of Personal Effects that is incorporated into the Will by reference. This allows my clients to keep a running inventory of bequests and beneficiaries for personal times that can be changed over time.


I provide this memorandum as part of the estate planning notebook I create for my clients. The Memorandum, referenced in the Will, is binding and it simply has to be dated and signed. This allows the personal representative or family members peace of mind and ease. It avoids the stress and conflict of having to figure out who gets what. An analogy I recently read about in the New York Times is that without this Memorandum, its like waking up to a house full of kids on Christmas morning and having no name tags on any of the wrapped gifts – chaos!  To read this article click here.

The article, references a workbook called Who Gets Grandma’s Yellow Pie Plate, by Marlene Stum. She says that the process starts with recognizing that dividing up a loved ones’ belongings is laden with emotions and can be a real mine field for family members and friends. The workbook helps sort out the process by helping people:

  • Determine what you want to accomplish, decide what's fair to your family.
  • Understand belongings have different meanings to different individuals.
  • Consider distribution options and consequences
  • Agree to manage conflicts if they arise.

To learn more about this workbook, click here.

In representing my probate clients, I have seen sibling relationships torn apart because they don’t agree about how to divide up the personal property of the deceased.   My clients that are appointed as personal representatives really struggle, during a time of personal grieving, to try to figure out how to divvy up personal effects fairly, without hurt feelings.

All of this can be avoided with an estate plan that provides for a Memorandum of Personal Effects. I advise my clients to use this Memorandum as a living, breathing document that they can continue to add to and change as time goes by. So when a loved one expresses a sentimental attachment to a certain item, my client can simply add that to their Memorandum and know that that beneficiary will receive that heirloom.

Estate Planning For Single People


Single people without children often avoid estate planning and the challenges associated with it, because of feeling overwhelmed or unsure.  This is unfortunate because its even more critical for single people to plan ahead and name their fiduciaries and beneficiaries as there is no clear cut answer for their loved ones should something happen.

The following questions should be addressed:

To whom should I leave my assets?

Do I need to consider creating a trust to manage my assets now or for my chosen beneficiaries in the future?

Who should be my personal representatives and/or trustees?

Who should be my agents for my medical and financial powers of attorney?

If you are a single person without young children, you can leave your assets to whomever you choose, including but not limited to your partners, relatives, friends or charitable organizations. In Colorado, you can also create Pet Trusts and name trustees to care for your animals. If you do not have an estate plan in place, the state will dictate who will inherit your assets.  A recent case in point, the author of the Girl With the Dragon Tattoo series, Stieg Larrsen did not have an estate plan and as a result, his estranged father and brother, whom he had not spoken to for over 20 years before his death inherited his entire estate and all royalties thereof while his long-time love and assistant, whom he had lived with for 20 years was cut off, receiving nothing.

Selection of the right personal representatives and trustees is also essential to successful estate and trust administration. Who do you trust to administer your estate, especially if your relatives live far away or are unfamiliar with your affairs?  In addition, health care and financial powers of attorney are very important documents to have in place since you may need these agents to make crucial medical decisions on your behalf as well as control your financial matters if you are ever unable to do so on your own because of disability.

Estate planning for a single person often demands more attention to detail than estate planning for married persons or single persons with children or grandchildren - because there is no obvious answer.  A Will is usually sufficient for unmarried persons with smaller estates, but a Living Trust may be a better option for persons with larger estates (click here to read about Living Trusts). Your estate planning documents should be reviewed regularly, particularly when there have been changes in the law or in your personal situation. As a single person, it is very important that you understand how your assets are currently held and how they will pass after your death.